Becoming
Chapter 10: Becoming
Everything tightened as debut approached.
Schedules multiplied. Rehearsals stretched into midnight. Every calorie, every breath, every second of sleep began to feel like it belonged to the company. Not to her.
And yet–
Xinyi felt more alive than she ever had.
She’d look at herself in the mirror before each vocal run and see someone steadier. Someone real. Her shoulders still shook sometimes. Her voice still cracked. But there was a clarity now in the way she stood.
A knowing.
The company hadn’t discovered the kiss. Or maybe they had, and decided to look away. Either way, the silence around her grew thicker. She felt the pressure of eyes, the weight of being special–marked.
But she didn’t flinch.
She had chosen this.
She was choosing this.
One morning, during a styling session, a coordinator adjusted the neckline of her outfit and said, “You really suit this look. It’s like you’ve always been meant to be here.”
Xinyi blinked, then smiled. Not forced. Not defensive. Just grateful.
“谢谢,” she said softly. “정말 감사합니다.”
Later that evening, when she removed the makeup and let the wig fall from her scalp, she didn’t feel like she was losing something.
She felt like someone preparing.
She called Suwei that night, voice tired but warm.
“I think I’m starting to understand what she meant. The version of me I used to livestream… she wasn’t pretend. She was just waiting.”
Suwei didn’t speak right away. Then she said, “You’re not becoming someone new, Xin. You’re finally becoming someone whole.”
And she cried then. Just a little. Quietly. Because it wasn’t sadness. It was recognition.
When the PDs announced the official debut lineup, she stood in a room filled with bright lights and nervous girls. Her name was read first.
“Xinyi.”
She stepped forward.
Not as a secret.
Not as a disguise.
But as herself.
And when the applause followed, she bowed deeply–hands shaking, breath steady.
She didn’t need to look for Minjae in the crowd.
She already knew.
He was watching.
And smiling.